By Joel Hilliker
I’m all ears, singles.
You’ve been on my mind quite a lot lately. In a lot of my personal prayer and study, in conversations with several singles and ministers, I’ve been mulling over the particular concerns, desires and struggles of the singles in God’s Church, and even in this world.
In the newest Trumpet issue, our cover story “The Incredible Shrinking Man” garnered quite a lot of response from singles who agreed or disagreed—sometimes vehemently—with some of the conclusions we came to about the state of relations between men and women today. It helped me to get a better picture of some of the challenges and trials facing people in this post-sexual revolution world.
It is becoming clearer just how aggressively Satan has worked—over a period of decades—to confuse us, to weaken us, to complicate our dealings with each other, to convolute the sexual landscape, and ultimately to throw up every possible impediment to us forming happy marriages and godly families.
It is also becoming clearer that these problems in society have had an adverse impact on God’s people.
I know many of you would like to be married, but for one reason or another, it isn’t happening. There is an obstacle in the way—maybe several. No one to date. Not being financially ready. Poor health. A personal desire to mature more emotionally, or spiritually. Shyness. A fear of commitment. Looking around but not seeing anyone who fits the bill. Bad experiences in the past that have left you cynical, or scarred.
Singles: I would like to hear from you. If you want to be married, what is holding you back? Actually, let’s go one step further: If you don’t want to be married, why not?
What obstacles are in your way?
My ears are open. I’m listening. I’d like to better understand your perspective. To hear your thoughts, your frustrations, your hopes, your desires. To learn what is getting in the way of your dating, or why that dating isn’t leading you to marriage.
My hope is that, amid a world that is doing so much to discourage families from forming, God’s Church can do more to reach out and help you clear away some of those barriers.
We all understand that God does not intend for everyone to be married in this life. By no means is being married a prerequisite for salvation.
At the same time, in thinking and praying about this, I’m convinced that many of these obstacles can be overcome. I’m certain that God would love for many of you to marry.
But I also suspect that, with some of you, He is looking for you to pursue that goal more directly.
So take this first step. Send me an e-mail at email@example.com. Speak your mind. Let’s get your thoughts and experiences on the table and take a look.