Just after my daughter Eyren was born, my wonderful mother-in-law, Kay Taber, came to stay with us for several weeks in order to help us adjust to having two children. Kay (I called her Mom) loved taking care of newborn infants. This gave my wife the much-needed rest to recuperate after giving birth. Being a wonderful homemaker, she spoiled all of us by doing the cooking, cleaning and laundry. My mother-in-law also came to visit after the births of my last two daughters, Sarah and Emily.
These were fun times because she often took us to a restaurant for a dinner (a rare treat for us at that time). In addition, before she returned home she always took my wife and daughters shopping for clothing and toys.
I remember at the time of Eyren’s birth, the shopping excursion was quite fruitful. Besides buying some much-need clothing for my wife, the new baby and our oldest daughter Rachel, at my wife’s suggestion, Mom purchased a sturdy, pink kitchen play set, which included a refrigerator, stove, sink and cabinet with plastic cooking pans, skillet, dishes, utensils and food items. Standing against a wall it looked like a mini-kitchen. Rachel was thrilled: My wife did not allow Rachel to play with her pots and pans, and now she had her own.
One day, I noticed Rachel (a little over 2 at the time) fully engrossed at cooking in her kitchen. She was really happy—giggling and talking to herself as she was preparing her plastic meal. It looked like so much fun I had to get involved. I remember casually going to where she was playing, and I asked her, “What’s for dinner?” Without hesitation, she looked at me, grinned and said, “Chinken.” I worked hard not to crack up with laughter. “What is chinken?” I asked, attempting to show sincere interest. “It is Chinese food,” was her immediate reply.
I sat there dumfounded. How did my firstborn toddler come up with the word “chinken” for Chinese food? My wife believes that she took the idea from the Chun King Chinese food my mother-in-law most likely prepared for us on her visit.
We protected and held on to that toy kitchen set for years. All four of my daughters remember playing with their kitchen. That toy kitchen set did much to help all of my daughters develop into the women they are today. Do you believe that? Here is why you should.
Harness the Positive Power of Play
Unfortunately, many families today do not recognize the power of constructive—structured—play. In fact, they don’t know what constitutes constructive and structured play. Playing on a computer, game station, iPad or iPod is not constructive and structured play—it is screen entertainment. Excessive screen time is dangerously destructive to infants, toddlers, adolescents, teens and adults. God’s Philadelphia ministry has been warning us about the dangers of electronic media for several years. The question is: Are we listening?
Earlier this month, the American Academy of Pediatrics made a ground-shaking announcement about its 2013 recommendations for children and media use. They suggest limiting the total screen time for children over 2 years old to two hours or less a day and advise “discouraging” any screen time, at all, for children under the age of 2. This announcement sent a shockwave through the world of media proponents, researchers, teachers, politicians and parents—mostly the parents. “An awful lot of parents wonder how realistically they can adhere to them,” reported the Huffington Post making specific reference to the aap’s latest recommendations. What a disturbing reaction from parents!
It appears that the majority of parents either have no control of their children, even those 2 and under, or deep down they want their children to have screen time. Are any of us these kind of parents? We must not be guilty of sacrificing our children’s vitally important playtime to brain- and body-mushing electronic screens. We had better take warning, if not from God’s ministry then from the aap. Screen time can seriously harm your child’s physical, mental and spiritual development.
However, providing constructive playtime for your toddlers, adolescents and teens unleashes a power for development that will provide them the skills to become a tremendously successful person. Here are some tips on how to harness the power of play.
Turn Play Into Learning Time
Do not use playtime as the means to get your kids out of your hair. Learn to see that playing, when done right, is learning time. Aimless, unstructured play is a waste of your child’s time. This is why it is so important that you get involved in playtime activities. Plan, initiate, oversee and guide your child’s playtime—especially for toddlers 2 and under. Realize that Proverbs 29:15—“The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame”—applies to play time as well. Sending a child or children off to play alone can lead to disastrous results. It is your responsibility to teach your child how to play properly.
Be sure to develop a well-balanced play curriculum for your children. A majority of parents today focus only on developing their child’s mind. This is one reason why electronic screen devices have become so popular. Yet, too many parents are neglecting to develop their child’s physical body. Infants, toddlers and young adolescents need play activities that promote both mental and physical growth.
Play is the perfect time to teach the values of giving, sharing and supporting others. I cannot stress enough how important it is for your child to learn these aspects of godly character as early as possible. Infants and toddlers are innately selfish. They do not naturally want to give or share their toys with others. Who better than you to teach your child how to properly interact with others?
An Effective Play Formula
What ingredients make for the best play activities? Follow this alphabetic formula. You could call it the abcipow plan. It represents the seven planks for effective play.
Make sure that your children have lots of physically Active outdoor playtime, weather permitting of course. To develop strong bodies and minds children need to run, jump, breathe in volumes of fresh air, and get plenty of sunshine. Active play develops physical coordination and stamina.
When I was in elementary school, I remember playing outside all day in the summer, except at meal times. We never considered being indoors watching television—besides, our parents would not allow it. When school was in session, we played outside in the fall, winter and spring after school ended for the day. Older adolescents and teens need to be involved with a regular exercise program. It is interesting to note that aap points to excessive screen time as one of the leading causes of obesity in children.
The most effective play activities are those where you encourage your child to Build or Create something. Both of these activities put your child’s Imagination to work. Incorporating these elements into playtime is simpler than you think. Be sure to plan activities appropriate for your child’s age. For example, providing a set of blocks for your infant who can sit up and hold things would easily satisfy a bci plan. It is fascinating to watch a young child play with blocks. They soon discover a variety of ways to stack them, arrange them in a row, and make shapes.
You need not go to great expense to develop fun and effective bci activities. Our girls had great fun with cardboard boxes using them to chug along mountain passes and sail the seven seas. As your children grow older, you can introduce them to art, music or simple construction projects. What young child has not built a fort out of blankets in the family room? Parents, be creative! Use your imaginations to build effective learning play activities.
Get POW With Play
As your children grow older, introduce activities that develop higher-level mental skills as they play. Teach them to Plan, Organize and Work while playing. My grandsons love Legos, as do many other boys and girls. (One of my daughters enjoyed playing with Legos more than her dolls.) To get the maximum benefit from their Legos, my grandsons must use planning, organization and work to build a building, castle or farm out of Legos.
Each set of Legos comes with instructions. I have been amazed to watch my grandsons sit down with a set of instructions and patiently work for hours to build a complicated object. I have observed them using planning and organization as they located and grouped the pieces to be joined together to complete their project. In addition, I have watched my grandsons learn responsibility by putting their Legos away in a neat and orderly fashion after playing with them. Do you see the power of play?
While watching Rachel play on her pink kitchen set, Deborah and I soon recognized the value of that playtime. Light bulb—we got an idea. When we could afford it, we added a child-size table and chairs to Rachel’s kitchen. After that we added a tea set and other dishes. I’ll never forget the times that I enjoyed the cups and plates of invisible tea and biscuits with my daughters before they grew out of their kitchen.
And I will never forget the day when Rachel met me at the door (she was about 11 at the time) and said, “Dad, I baked a cake today, would you try it and tell me what you think?” I really liked it. Her husband, three children and I still like her cooking and baking to this day. Of course we don’t eat “chinken”—we eat wholesome, lovingly prepared food. Now you see how there was real power in that little pink kitchen.